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Who are all these people that suddenly want to be my friend? I vaguely remember some of their names as being people who mostly wanted nothing to do with me during school.

My mum must have been right all along. She said that one day they would all realise what they had been missing.

What is this need to 'collect' as many friends as possible?

Too much, not enough.

Well. 50% of my readership has asked me to tell you something, so here goes.

If I join the circus I will get paid peanuts, but maybe I'll meet a bearded lady to take care of me.

If I build a cottage in a forest the roof will probably leak, but there will be plenty of wood to keep the hearth warm.

If I become a hermit there will be no one to confide in, and no one to chide me.

There is a life waiting for me underneath a rock somewhere, but I am too blinded by fluorescent lights to find my way out.

There you go. This is why I do not write.

Whither shall I wander?

I am (almost definately) going away in 2008.

Had a telephone meeting with a lady from Cross Cultural Solutions just now to discuss my options. It seems what is hampering me is that I am too flexible about what kind of work I am prepared to do, I don't have asthma or allergies, and am equally happy looking at trees and seeing Art.

So, I need to narrow it down before I enrol. The countries CCS work in are:

In Africa
Volta Region- Ghana
Rabat- Morocco
Cape Town- South Africa
Arusha, Kilimanjaro, and Bagamoyo- Tanzania


In Asia
Xi'an- China
Bangkok and Trang- Thailand
New Delhi and Dharamsala (Himalayas)- India



In Eastern Europe
Yaroslavl- Russia


In Latin America
Salvador- Brazil
Lima and Ayacucho- Peru
Guatemala City and Quetzaltenango- Guatemala
San Carlos, Cartago, and Puriscal- Costa Rica

I look at the name of each country and get a bit excited. But I can only go to one.

Argh, decisions....

A Rude Poem that Rhymes

I met a girl with whiskers
She had them on her cat
I asked to stroke her pussy
She said, "No, kiss my twat."

Stormy waters, to be near you

Continuing my plan to get out of my job (and the country) in the next six months, I followed a lead in the Observer travel magazine today.

It suggested a couple of websites on which yaghts and their owners/ captains advertise for crew members. Ok, so it's not quite volunteer work, but I could do both, no?

Well, unless I am ready to sail by October at the latest I am out of luck until next summer, it seems.

But if there are any women out there who are looking for a sugar daddy (please don't), it appears that this is a very good alternative to dating sites, as many of the middle age yaghtsters specifically request female crew, and a recent photograph. Don't forget to include your vital statistics, because they need to make sure that you'll really float their boat.

Sad old lady

I am not old enough to give up on a social life completely, but how long do I have to wait before people are not surprised if I don't feel like going quarters on some mdma?

For Christ's sake, quarters?